It's getting better, isn't it? I think so...so much so I can't even bear to look at the older stuff at the bottom! I worry at what shocking errors I will find...maybe it's better that way; signs of progression!
Sunday, January 18, 2009
...liv the sieve
Liv woke to find the other half of her bed empty. Her latest catch had slipped on his clothes and sloped off and into the winter night. Yet another man had slipped through her fingers and into the ether. Liv the Sieve strikes again.
She rose and shuffled in her slippers towards the large bay window. The cold draught slipped through the cracks, a piercing shiver flashed through her bones. The snowfall of the past week had lasted slightly longer than her latest ill-fated and brief relationship. In the last of the snow she spied a faint footprint; she wondered if it was his. The last of him she would likely ever see.
In the midst of her stare, the garden gate seemingly moved. It was a mere trick of the mind. She knew there would be no return of him to her with flowers and a beaming smile. Liv wrapped her dressing-gown tightly to insulate whatever warmth she had left.
Behind her in the distance a noise grew to a cacophony. Her son raced into the room and toward the window. He raised his arms up to her to let him look outside. His small hands pressed against the frosty glass. He wiped at the window with his teddy bear to clear a view to the snowman he had lovingly built with Liv's new (yet already former) beau a few days earlier.
The boy's excitement was rapidly short lived. Only a few large snowballs and the obligatory carrot visibly remained on the grass.
"He's gone!" the boy cried.
The acute irony was not lost on Liv as she pulled him close for a consolatory sigh and cuddle.
"I know, baby, I know."
This post has 2 comments
I'm finding it harder and harder to find errors when I put my nitpick cap on. Bah! I thrive on this stuff. What am I supposed to do when there's nothing left to nitpick?
I saw your "About Me" blurb to the left and had to nod in understanding about the "not being as good as I thought" thing. Me too!! I learned a lot when I was on a Writer's Group. The biggest hurdle is swallowing the pride, squaring the shoulders, and receiving the crits without a flinch, which you seem to be doing nicely. And your writing is improving in leaps and bounds because of it. Keep it up!
9/10
see me after class :-)